Thursday, December 3rd was a very normal day, Chris had left in the morning when I left for work, dropped the girls at my parent's house, and went to Camp. We only spoke once when he got there and the rest of my day was in classes while he was to be working hard cleaning out the basement with Jon. Well throughout the day I had, had difficulty with my phone, couldn't make calls out, etc. so it was a wonder that Chris was able to get through to me when he did. But as I was pulling to the stoplight on my way to pick up the girls, he called and asked me a series of questions about heart attacks, all while seeming to be out of breath. When I asked, why, he replied with words a wife and mother of 3 small girls, NEVER wants to hear, "I think I'm having a heart attack".
Thankfully he was right near an Urgent Care Facility and I was able to turn at the light to head his way. Now, I can't say that I was completely with it at all from start to finish, but every moment I stopped and went to prayer, God was there. He never once, forsook me. Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” That gave me strength, every time, never once was He delayed. After he was in the door, I got one call out, to my mom and I will tell you, it was no easier saying it than it was to hear it. I couldn't have been 4 or 5 minutes behind him, when I got to his room they were hooking him up to the EKG, he was pale, clammy looking, taking very shallow breaths, delayed and weak. The nurse printed out maybe a 2 inch piece of the EKG reading and turned out the door, immediately the Dr. came in with a rush of information and instructions. "Mr. Hughes we think you are having a heart attack", "we have called 911", "the paramedics should be here shortly they will take you to the hospital", "do you have chest pain?”, “does it go through to your back?", "shortness of breath?", "do you have nausea/vomiting?", "do you have pain in your arm?", and with every answer, he confirmed and she lost color, “I am going to give you a baby aspirin, I want you to chew it, it will not taste good but you must chew it then we will give you nitroglycerin it will go under your tongue it will help with your pain." You know in the movies when the loved ones pass out from the shear shock of what is happening? Well that's real, I immediately felt the rush of reality, the realization that immortality is not real. I felt my heart break that my husband, the one being that knows me second best of all, the sole partner in my life, my children's father, the leader of my family was having a heart attack. I lost my breath, my heart literally skipped a few beats in pain, and I had to sit down and breathe. This was not in my control, we are in God's hands, the best possible hands to be in, He will sustain me. I got up and stood with him, then the paramedics arrived, they loaded him on the gurney hooked him to their machines, dropped another whole load of information on me at 5 sps(sentences per second) speed, we prayed, and they were gone. I left to meet them at the hospital.
By the time that I got to the ED (rush hour traffic...)the EMT driver was waiting for me at the door with my visitor pass, he walked me straight back to Chris in the holding room where about 20 nurses/attendings/etc. were waiting for me. Once I arrived I was whisked across the hall by 3 of them who then spoke to me about what was happening, what was going to happen and what needed to happen. Once they spoke with me they ran , literally, with police escorts and all down the hall to the Cath lab. After the emergency cath and stent, the Dr. came down to talk to me about what he found and how the procedure went. After explaining the procedure and what is to come, he wrapped up with "right now what we need to do is get all of our prayer warriors going, because prayer is what we need the most." Right then I was immediately at peace, God placed this man to be right where he needed to be to use his faith to guide him through caring for my husband. I am so thankful. Later I found out that the Cath lab had closed for the evening and everyone had left for the day when they called to notify them that Chris was on his way in by ambulance. The Dr. had to turn around and come back to the hospital and re-open the Cath lab for him. As we were going over his future limitations briefly, the Dr. says "so you run a youth camp?"...As sick as he was, having a heart attack and all, he's laying on the bed as the Dr. is about go into his heart and is talking about camp. There are times in our walk with Christ that He lifts us up that we might sing His praises, this was one of those times. As he still had breath to speak, God gave him the words, and I am so thankful for the strength that he was given to use the platform provided to share Christ.
We have been praying for so much lately, for direction with the camp, for clarity in our calling, for opportunity to share Christ, for time to get our house prepared to go on the market, for a break. I personally have been in prayer over feeling God move in my life, this was my answer. Never have I felt Him move more than he did that night or in the hours/days/weeks to come. God is so faithful to provide, we have been showered with support and love from many. With prayers that reached God's ear and He obliged so beautifully. To spare my best friend his life here on earth and to make us all stronger because of it. Blessings come in many different forms and though I can't count them all, I know that each was fitted perfectly by my Father just for me. Just like a diamond, there are numerous facets, that Christ has carved into us to make us shine brighter, it is our prayer that we never lose that sparkle. When we pray, our minds go to our ideal answers, God knows so much more than what we could ever fathom and I am thankful that He doesn't usually take my suggestions. His healing is so perfect, more than just physical, He heals spiritually so deeply that it causes an unrest that can only be calmed by His hand. To fall prostrate in awe and wonder has new meaning and I am thankful that it is not possible for me to feel the full effect of that in my current state, I am not worthy. One day I will know more and I pray that that day my soul will be completed in Him so that I will be able to feel all of His glory without exploding.
Ephesians 3:14-21 For this reason I bow my knees before the Father from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith-that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.
I will leave you with this, God is good, this is the truth that I have and I live with every day in all things. He never fails and will never leave us. The moment that you come to this realization it will all make sense, everything will fall into place. I am not perfect, never have been and at best I am nowhere near worthy of His affection, yet He doesn't let my shortcomings interfere with His love or the abundance that He pours into me and our lives. In Christ I have been redeemed and God the Father sees me as righteous through His Son. My praises will never end. Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. We are all called to do His will and we all have specifics, we need to pray for God to reveal them to us, that we may sacrifice our lives as He sacrificed His own.
I am thankful and humbled that God chose Chris to use for His glory. This heart attack has been more of a blessing than I can express in words. I am so humbled at the way He chooses to display His great power and love for us. God IS good, all the time.
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